Co-parenting is the experience of raising children as a single parent in the event of separation or divorce. Co-parenting isn’t easy, especially if you have a contentious relationship with your ex-partner. If you have limited communication with your ex, it’s even more difficult to successfully co-parent and raise your child with the stability and security they need. The quality of the co-parents’ relationship has a strong influence on the mental and emotional well-being of children, so it’s important to do what’s possible to maintain an amicable relationship with your ex.
Co-parenting is often a difficult process and is greatly influenced by the reciprocal interactions of each parent. It requires empathy, patience, and open communication for success. Placing the sole focus on your children can be a great way of helping to make co-parenting a more positive experience.
However, if you and your ex desire to have limited contact with one another, or were issued a no-contact order, co-parenting can be even more challenging. But, co-parenting with little contact isn’t impossible.
Here are some solutions that may help you maintain a civil and communicative relationship with your ex-partner.
- Each parent can keep a notebook to share information with one another. Record any matters related to your child during your visitations that the other parent may need to know. This information may include behavioral issues, health information, school grades and assignments, social events, and more. You can also include the child’s schedule and alert one another of your child’s upcoming responsibilities and appointments.
- Share your child’s photos with the other parent, or parent’s family. It’s important to try to include the other parent in your child’s life. This shows that you’re willing to be a mature adult and support your co-parent’s active role in your child’s life.
- Consider using the service ProperComm. ProperComm is specifically designed to be a “procedure for communicating” by or for anyone who is in high conflict or have difficulty communicating in an appropriate manner. For example, this service monitors email correspondence between parents, and the service screens emails and removes any offensive language that may violate the PFA.
- Consider appointing a third person to monitor disputes and provide solutions. This third person can gather information from each parent and issue, as well as issue a report or recommendation to the court. Each state has different laws regarding this appointment, so be sure to check your state’s laws before making a decision on the third person. Typically, if neither parent nor the judge objects, the court signs an order to implement the outlined recommendations.
- Use Zimplified, a life management tool created for separated and divorced couples with children. Zimplified helps to simplify, organize, and streamline parenting life, reduce stress and conflict, and foster collaboration. This mobile and desktop app can help parents share information and communicate such as maintaining calendars, important documents, and child-related expenses.
Although it’s important to do what’s best for your child, it’s also important to remember not to compromise your own safety in the process. If you have concerns about your co-parent’s behavior, due to violence, substance abuse, etc., please consider seeking the counsel of an attorney. Contact the divorce attorneys in Long Island and Garden City, NY today at Rieger, LLP.